Sunday, April 15, 2007

This blog is about trousers. And shame tolerance.

This blog is a year old. Happy Birthday to me.

My first ever post, sometime in April 2006, was a shamefully self-indulgent weepy about being oh-so-alone in the world. I don't think anyone had time to read it (thankfully), as after a night spent tossing and turning in deep embarrassment over it, I went back and deleted it the next day. It is the only one I have deleted, and I have a pact with myself I shan't do it again. Sometimes I even make myself live with the shame of spelling or grammatical errors (recently I wrote the word "elk" with an s-plural, the horror, the horror). The reason for this will become apparent in a moment.

My second post, the first one available now, is really eloquent. It says something like "just to see if I can find my way back to post again".

My third post, the second available, is about buying or not buying a pair of ludicrous trousers. I had put on a fair amount of weight in the recent years, and the trend continued with exponentially accelerated velocity in the US. I didn't buy the trousers mentioned in the post, and I'm glad. Since I returned to Finland in the summer, I have lost (thanks to a combination of picking up smoking again after 5-6 years and actually using public and pedestrian forms of transport, plus some fun exercise) 8 kg - that's 17.6 pounds, ca. 1.26 stone to you non-SI types - and they would've fallen off me.

My fourth post, third existing one, is probably the longest one to date, and deals with shame tolerance. (And here's the aforementioned reason.)

So there you have it, these really are my themes. Trousers = everything menial, trivial, embarrassingly uninteresting, unimportant stuff. Shame tolerance = my attempts at writing about things which do matter to me. I am, of course, equally (or more) inclined to be embarrassed and ashamed over the "trousers" posts as well. In a bundle of ways, this blog is actually all about increasing my shame tolerance.

What has this year brought to me? I have met some very nice people, startlingly nice people, brilliant people I wouldn't have met otherwise. I have avoided meeting any real wankers, which is pretty good going, as this is very possible online too. (The internet has some really wanky corners and people.) These are good things.

I have increased my shame tolerance levels no end. This, too, is a good thing (I hope - if it goes out of hand, I don't know whether it'll continue to be a good thing).

I am also aware of the fact I have returned to a much smoother writing process, I am not as blocked up as I was - I was as blocked up as a blocked-up-thing when I started. This, also, is a good thing.

I have had blog fatigue once or twice, when the whole thing seemed inane and dorky and I thought I'd never go back to it. Then I did. Which, I think, is also a good thing. Oh, goodness abounds around me. How good is that.

As a birthday present to my wee blog, I think I might start seriously considering changing my photo.

This has been a trousers post.


The Periodic Englishman said...

Happy Blog Birthday, beautiful blogger. You and your blog are doing brilliantly well and I find you both to be rather magnificent.

With affection,

Jamie x

Anna MR said...

Thank you, kind sir.

*She curtsies. She does a nice line in curtsies.*

nmj said...

And I am so happy that I found you when you found me by NEXT BLOGGING, Anna MR, can you imagine if we had never met?! I quite often refer to you in conversation as my Finnish friend, and my friends say 'what Finnish friend?', and I say Anna, and because they don't read my blog (most of my friends don't read my blog) they don't know who I'm talking about, they probably think I made you up! Happy happy Birthday, my lovely Finnish friend & excellent blogger x

kurt said...

Happy B Birthday, Anna.

Now whenever you think about years piling up on that other birthday, think of them piling up on this one. Your writing does seem extra smooth lately, so all this work is paying off.

I don't know about the photo. On one hand, I think the new haircut photo is great. On the other hand, your appeal transcends appearance.

Anna MR said...

Oh, nmj, kurt, you are too kind, the pair of you, my oldest blogpal friends. Isn't it a strange, strange world we live in...

*She has a little weep. She does a nice line in weeping, too.*

The Moon Topples said...

Happy Bloggiversary, Anna.

I'm not one of your oldest blogpals, having only just got here and all, but I do like it here.

You and your blog.

Anna MR said...

Mr Moon, that's lovely.

*She goes out to have a big bawl. She does a nice line in big bawls.*

Reading the Signs said...

Allow me too to wish you a belated happy blogaversary, and I look forward to further spooking around in the lurker shadows (if you hear things bumping around it will be me).

Anna MR said...

Ooh, Ms Signs, that sounds all stalker-y and stuff. Look forward to it. Although talking's nice, too.

Thank you also, incidentally.

*She has a liking for a bit of stalking. She has a nice line for liking a bit of stalking.* (Ok, this joke's wearing a bit thin now)

Reading the Signs said...

that thing you said about cigarettes - oh yes!
(a bit of stocking, you mean surely?)

Anna MR said...


Ms Signs, you have just shocked me. How wonderful. You come across all beautifully serene and instead you are a twisted pervy person, just like me.

How delightful. Don't leave.

Reading the Signs said...

What, moi? I don't wear them, myself.

Anna MR said...

You just write insinuatingly about them. That is probably even cooler.